12 years ago today in the presence of our loved ones Shaz and I exchanged rings and vows, it was unusually warm for the time of year.
The vows we exchanged where the traditional ones, we had thought of writing our own but decided against it, those vows we honoured, not because we felt bound by them, but instead because we lived by them for the previous 18 years, we loved, honoured, respected and trusted each other unconditionally.
The faithful part goes without saying, we where the love of each others life and always will be, on reflection we had a relationship that you often only see in movies.
I spent the days leading up to today dreading it, losing sleep over it, waves of grief coming back all over again wondering how I should feel, especially if someone was to wish me/us happy anniversary because, well, quite simply it isn't or wouldn't be with her physically here with me.
But, now that we arrive on this day I don't just feel sad, lost, and miss her with all my being, but I also feel pride that Shaz chose me, blessed that we was able to spend the time together that we had. I also have the love of my family and friends, while it is not the same as i always had that, it is enough.
My blog posts are often too wordy, or two picture heavy so I will leave it here with a new And Finally
This is a video clip I found from 2010, my brother had arranged a 60th birthday party for my mom at his house, I was waiting in the lounge for Shaz to get ready so we can leave, I had our camcorder at the ready as I was going to to record the evening and give it to my mom as a DVD ( I did, I am thankful that I did as there are many great videos of us together in it) anyway back the video below.
I have no idea why I did, but, I decided to video Shaz as she entered the lounge, she saw the camera and well, check out her reaction to it....
And finally ...
8 comments:
A lovely tribute to Shaz Doug, and lovely photos too. The landmark occasions will always take your breath away, and you just have to go with the flow. You and Shaz had a wonderful relationship, not everyone is blessed with such, and your memories will sustain you, Kate x
Beautiful words Doug, you were both blessed by each other. Sending you huge hugs,
Jan xxx
A very touching post, Doug
Kathyk
That is just so Shaz! this is a lovely tribute to your gorgeous, silly bird and I can well believe how you have felt in the lead up to, and today itself. Sending you much love and I just know that Shaz will be looking down on you smiling. xx Helen
Just like Shaz. You were the perfect couple and I feel for you today especially. Hugs! xx Sarah
Oh Doug, ‘silly’! Love that. Didn’t she look marvellous! Guessing that it wasn’t the last time you waited for her to get ready and played with a gadget to pass the time! I know it’s not ‘happy’, but I congratulate you on your anniversary; as you say, finding each other and being together was the best part of all of it, so I think congrats on that part are very appropriate. And of course, Shaz would be chuffed as beans that you’ve been able to talk about her on this most special of anniversaries, however painful the missing, the talking keeps her here. Xxxx
You really were blessed to have had each other so today should be marked for sure. Sending you lots of love.
Hugs,
Annie x
Thank you very much for the information you shared.
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